And Then There Were Three
by saess
Summary: Tsukushi frets over the details and Tsukasa has some second thoughts about his impending fatherhood, but at the end of the day, they still band together to fight off their demons. Literally. (A continuation of the series, taking place after Hana Yori Dango Final.)
1. Chapter 1

Summary: Tsukushi frets and Tsukasa has second thoughts, but at the end of the day, they still band together to fight off their demons. Literally. (A continuation of the series, taking place after Hana Yori Dango Final.)

AN: Enjoy (and feel free to leave a review if you do)!

(This is a humor fic.)

* * *

It was in Tsukasa's habits to keep a mental list of the most prominent issues he was currently encountering. Mostly, his concerns were just work-related, like the "Our-Stock-Prices-Are-Going-Down" debacle, or the "My-PA-Won't-Do-Her-Job" frustration. Occasionally, some problems involving Makino would make the top of the list, such as "My-Wife-Keeps-Vomiting-In-The-Morning", or the fight resulting in the "My-Wife-Is-Making-Me-Sleep-On-The-Couch" issue that stayed at the top of the list for four days.

This week's headlining problem, though, was titled "My-Wife-Has-Gone-Completely-And-Utterly-Insane".

And for many reasons.

To say the very least, Makino...

Was acting very strangely.

It began on the second day of November, when Makino entered their bedroom and abruptly placed a pot full of dirt on the windowsill.

"What's that?" Tsukasa asked, glancing over his shoulder to see what his wife was up to.

"It's a rosemary plant. I thought it'd help brighten up the place," she explained.

Tsukasa scoffed, and turned a page over in the newspaper. "We can buy flowers if you want something to look at."

Undeterred, his wife pointed out, "Well, I thought it would be more fun to have something we can both take care of as it grows."

He gave her an incredulous look. "I don't have the time. It can be your responsibility."

"We should both take care of it," his wife insisted.

"But-"

"You'll water it on the odd days, starting tomorrow, and I'll water it on the even days," Maknio said in one breath, before he even had a chance to get a word in.

"Wait-"

"Oh! Can you hear that?"

"Hear what?"

"The alarm! Oh, I must have forgotten to empty the stove. I'd better get that right away!"

With those words, Makino darted out of the room.

Tsukasa sighed, and folded up his newspaper. Obviously he wouldn't actually water the thing - if he refused to do it for long enough, Makino would eventually give in and water it herself. She should, anyway. It was her own damn plant.

Thinking the matter done with, he padded down to the kitchen to see if his wife had burned the place down yet.

...It should have ended there.

Except it didn't.

The next day, Makino threw something of a tantrum when she realized he hadn't watered the stupid rosemary.

"You're so irresponsible!" she muttered. "Can't you try to be on top of something for once in your life?"

"Don't be silly, Makino," he scoffed. "Besides, that statement doesn't make sense. I've been on top many times..." He waggled his eyebrows suggestively at her, and a pillow immediately flew into his face.

"Pervert!"

"Stupid!"

"I'm going out alone!"

"You can't!"

"Why not?"

"Because... because you're pregnant!"

"What the hell does that even mean? I can still walk! Pregnancy doesn't cause loss of legs!"

"Okay, well, maybe not, but I'm starting to think it causes loss of brains."

This only served to add more fuel to the fire. Makino gritted her teeth, then, very harshly, ground out, "If that's true, then you should've been the pregnant one since you'd have nothing to lose!"

All right, now things were starting to look serious. Time to throw in the towel.

"Okay, okay, you can calm down now. I was only joking around with you."

Makino's shoulders hunched slightly as she took on a less-aggressive stance, relaxing ever-so-slightly. "Well," she started, and Tsukasa smiled. See, he was getting better with his communication. In the past, this would've probably ended badly, with Makino storming off and leaving him to pout, but they were more mature now. They knew what they were-

"No way!" Makino abruptly yelled, her posture screaming hostility. "Not until you water that plant!"

Tsukasa watched, shellshocked, as she ran from the room, slamming the door behind her.

He blinked rapidly, trying to make sense of what had just happened. It didn't take too long for him to come to the conclusion that that... definitely could have gone a little better.

Sighing, he approached the source of the argument, scowling at it. There were no signs of life in the soil whatsoever, and the pot was so cheaply-made that it brought down the atmosphere of the room more than anything.

For a moment, he considered giving in and watering it... but that was just ridiculous! There was no reason for him to give in so easily like that. Anyway, it was Makino's fault for making such a fuss over something as trifling as a cup of dirt. Eventually, she would come to her senses, and apologize for her behavior.

...However long that took.

Makino continued to remain insistent that he water her plant, and Tsukasa avoided the thing like the plague as a result. And so it was in the week that ensued, the only thing that grew was Tsukasa's list of problems. "My-Wife-Has-Gone-Completely-And-Utterly-Insane" was now accompanied by his old friend "My-Wife-Is-Making-Me-Sleep-On-The-Couch". It didn't take long for those to be introduced to "My-Wife-May-Be-Planning-My-Murder", either.

Seeking an escape from anything that reminded him of the List, Tsukasa decided to have a day out with F4.

Except, for some reason, that also went badly.

"Are you certain you're prepared to take care of a child?" Rui asked, watching as Akira dealt the Hanafuda cards. "It's a big responsibility. If you start having second thoughts at any time, all the work will pile on to Makino."

"Of course I'm ready," Tsukasa rolled his eyes, smirking slightly. "I'm going to be the greatest dad ever."

"Tsukasa, you grew up without much of a father figure, and you were never close with your mother, of course," Rui pointed out, his eyes focused on the cards. "While Makino has some experience taking care of her brother, the only thing you've ever watched over is your stock credit. Don't you think there will be some problems down the road?"

"Well... Makino and I have already decided that even though there might be some problems, everything will be okay. We're together, after all," Tsukasa replied, annoyed with Rui's nonchalance.

"Don't misunderstand me. I truly want what's best for you and Makino. But even if things work out well for the two of you, you can't guarantee that everything will be okay for your child."

Tsukasa stood abruptly, anger painting his features. "Hey! Don't talk like that!"

Rui sighed. "This is my point exactly, Tsukasa. You might've changed a lot, but inside, you're still a child who makes rash decisions. That's not the behavior of a good role model."

"Heh. So you're saying someone like you would be a good role model?" Tsukasa scoffed.

"No." Rui reached for his cards. "But whatever you do from here on, try to remember that you're going to be responsible for shaping someone else's world."

Slightly subdued (but refusing to show it), Tsukasa took the cards that he'd been dealt and contemplated Rui's words.

* * *

Although Makino's plant was stupid, Tsukasa had begun to see it in a different light. It would be a good opportunity for him to practice taking responsibility for another living creature... no matter how unattractive the pot it was in might be. Thinking about it now, though, that would be an easy fix.

A few hours later, he came home with a brand-new watering can, a designer planter, plant food and some soil. Slipping on a pair of gloves, he moved the plant into its new home, and filled up the empty sides with the soil, sprinkling plant food where it was recommended in the picture. For extra measure, although the soil was already damp, he sprinkled some water on it, and stepped back to see his handiwork.

Oddly, even though this would technically be considered a surrender, it was satisfying to picture Makino's reaction to all this. Maybe he'd even start watering it daily.

That night, when Makino came home after a case, Tsukasa was patiently waiting on top of their bed, pretending to read a book. "What's this?" Makino asked, noticing the bags of plant food and soil by the door. He watched as her gaze fell onto the plant, and an unconscious smile peeled her lips back. "You finally watered it."

Tsukasa couldn't help his smirk either. Success! He might as well take "My-Wife-Is-Making-Me-Sleep-On-The-Couch" and "My-Wife-May-Be-Planning-My-Murder" off the list now.

But then... Makino... _sighed_. "It took you forever. You're not going to forget tomorrow, are you?"

...Never mind.

* * *

AN: I have Tsukasa calling Tsukushi "Makino" throughout this fic... even though they're married, I feel like he'd still use her name. After all, after years of being engaged, he still didn't call her by her first name.

Part two will be up soon! :) Thank you for your patience.


	2. Chapter 2

AN: Previously on this fic... "AN: Part two will be up soon!"

Heh... Heh. Well, waiting half a year to update isn't THAT late, is it?

* * *

After a few weeks, it became clear that there was another, potentially bigger problem, much to Tsukasa's chagrin.

And that problem was currently named "The-Plant-My-Wife-Purchased-For-The-Two-Of-Us-To-Grow-Together-That-Is-Also-A-Metaphor-For-My-Impending-Duties-As-A-Father-Is-Not-Growing-At-All".

...Well, there was a reason why Makino would be the one naming the child and not Tsukasa.

Point was, the thing would not grow. There was little to no development in the height department for the mound of dirt.

"I think our plant is broken," Tsukasa had whispered to Makino one night.

"The whuh?" she'd whispered back, groggily shifting beneath the sheets.

"Like Ashes Ketchup. I don't think it's capable of growing."

"...Do you mean Ash Ketchum?"

And that had been the end of that conversation.

The next day, Tsukasa took a trip to the store and purchased some fertilizer, hoping that that'd give it a growth spurt.

It didn't. The dirt sat there, _mocking_ him.

* * *

"My plant won't grow," he told Rui, over their game of _Battleship_.

Rui leaned back, taking a sip from his drink. "Hey, hey, isn't that something you should be telling your doctor?"

"I mean the rosemary that Makino bought," Tsukasa said, leveling his best glare at Rui, then sweeping it over the rest of the group. "I figured one of you might have some gardening tricks up your sleeve."

"Have you been remembering to water it?" Akira asked.

Tsukasa nodded. "Every day for a while, but I was concerned about overwatering so I cut back a bit."

"Man," Sojiro said, an almost reverent expression on his face. "This is such a blatant metaphor."

* * *

When Tsukushi entered her bedroom after a long, hard day at work, ready for a nice shower and a night of catching up on _Pride_ , she most certainly did not expect to walk in on Tsukasa desperately digging up the pot on their windowsill.

"What the - hey, stop that!" She ran forward to grab it out of his hands, but Tsukasa ducked out of the way and clutched the pot to his chest, eyes desperate.

"These are fake!" He shouted. "They have to be!"

"What - why - You're getting dirt all over our room!"

"They're totally fake!"

" _What's_ _fake_?"

"The seeds!" Tsukasa roared. "It's a trick, or something. It's gotta be..."

Tsukushi made another move towards the pot, Tsukasa once again ducking out of her reach. She let out a frustrated noise.

"Why are you being like this?"

And then, much to Tsukushi's horror, his eyes filled with tears. She moved forwards - perhaps to comfort him, but Tsukasa cut off her movement.

"Shut up, I'm not crying," Tsukasa snapped.

"This has to be about more than just the plant," she said.

Tsukasa averted his gaze. "I don't wanna talk about it," he said.

"Even so," she said, quietly, "I'm still willing to listen."

There was silence, a pause, for a long time. Then, finally, Tsukasa spoke.

"I'm bad, at... this," he said, softly. "I don't know how to take care of things. I'm irresponsible. My dad was rarely around, and you already know how my mother is. She didn't raise me to be a good parent, she raised me to be good with business and people. Even then, I have trouble conducting myself in interviews. And I make a lot of mistakes." He looked up. "But I love you. I thought that would be enough, that having you meant we could get through this together... but I don't know. You don't deserve to have to do this alone, and I don't want you to. But I don't know how to help," he finished, rather lamely.

Tsukushi sighed, taking a seat on the bed and gesturing for Tsukasa to sit beside her.

"I admit, I had some doubts. I still have some doubts," she admitted. "About whether or not we were both ready for a child. And you are right. You - and I included - do a lot of regrettable things, and make a lot of mistakes. But." Tsukushi hesitated. "We feel bad about the regrettable things, and we learn from the instances where we're mistaken." Tsukushi turned, looking him in the eye. "There's a lot of good in you, enough to outweigh the not-so-good parts. I think that's what matters, mostly."

She laced her fingers through his. "We're in this together, with our child. That's all that matters."

* * *

AN: Yes, there will be another update after this, and hopefully not too late!


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